Oh, The People You’ll Know!

Graduations, diminished though they may be, are upon us, and in an act of hope, I am on a flight to give the commencement address at a very nice high school back East.

This won’t be the first time I’ve stood in front of the capped and gowned but nonetheless, it’s daunting business: what can I tell a carefully spaced field of students that might actually be useful, something upbeat but also true? In earlier commencement seasons, I have emphasized adventures. I love going places, figuratively and literally. Slipping into the buzzy chaos of Manhattan or losing myself entirely in the magnificent landscapes of Montana? These are experiences not to be forgotten or dismissed.

But besides the obvious problem — no one has gone anywhere for a year now — I’ve begun to wonder if that’s really the most promising direction a graduate can point herself. The long year at home has me thinking that life’s great gifts aren’t so much the places you will go but the people you will know. It’s both my experience and the conclusion of much research that the most powerful driver of human happiness is meaningful connection to others.

Now, I’m not all about happiness as a goal in and of itself but as a driver of productivity, health and contribution­­? You bet. The fact is happy people do more. They live more. They give more. Happiness helps makes possible the things that make lives — and societies — thrive.

So how will we know them, these people who are places unto themselves? I say it’s ours for the asking…